Aug 23

My Apple.com/Switch Ad

I love my little Macbook.  It’s so cute.  And this coming from a guy who has Windows experience back to 3.1, and whose primary job responsibility is to support and manage a Windows domain and hundreds of clients.  So why is my Macbook so nice?

For one main reason: it’s polished. That critical “step-back” after everything is done to say “what can we improve now?”  This is something that Microsoft and companies who build Intel PCs are seriously lacking.

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Aug 12

Baby, It’s Cold Outside: The Story of Blue Balls

One of my favorite songs of all time is the timeless hit “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” as recorded by Margaret Whiting and Johnny Mercer (although written by Frank Loesser). Despite it’s popularity during the winter holiday season, I have found it quite enjoyable all year round.

The duet is one of ’s best, second only to Ella Fitzgerald and Louis Armstrong’s version of Summertime.  While the characters in the song do not have names, the female voice is called “The Mouse” while the male is “The Wolf”.

The song is a back-and-forth duet of the male persuading the female to stay with him for the duration of the night after their date; her indecisive protests clarify while she is obligated to go home, she is tempted to stay.

Upon closer inspection of the lyrics (”You have to listen to the words, MAAAHHN”), the wolf employs classic teenage bargaining techniques in order to guilt his prey into staying “the night” and slowly persuades her through potentially-ruffied alcohol.  While the song ends before you know her decision, (in some versions) soft pillow-talk banter closes out the song and the wolf whispers a lingering “Ahh, do that again…”.

Thickly-veiled references to sex were very popular throughout in the 50s and 60s, but this is the first reference to date rape I can find.  I just hope you think about this song and its true intended meaning when your mother and father get up to the karaoke machine, eggnog in hand, and share the mic with this holiday classic.


I really can’t stay – Baby it’s cold outside
I’ve got to go away – Baby it’s cold outside
This evening has been – Been hoping that you’d drop in
So very nice – I’ll hold your hands, they’re just like ice
My mother will start to worry – Beautiful, what’s your hurry
My father will be pacing the floor – Listen to the fireplace roar
So really I’d better scurry – Beautiful, please don’t hurry
Well maybe just a half a drink more – Put some records on while I pour

The neighbors might think – Baby, it’s bad out there
Say, what’s in this drink – No cabs to be had out there
I wish I knew how – Your eyes are like starlight
To break the spell – I’ll take your hat, your hair looks swell
I ought to say no, no, no, sir – Mind if I move closer
At least I’m gonna say that I tried – What’s the sense in hurting my pride?
I really can’t stay – Baby don’t hold out
Ahh, but it’s cold outside


C’mon baby


I simply must go – Baby, it’s cold outside
The answer is no – Ooh darling, it’s cold outside
This welcome has been – I’m lucky that you dropped in
So nice and warm – Look out the window at that storm
My sister will be suspicious – Man, your lips look delicious
My brother will be there at the door – Waves upon a tropical shore
My maiden aunt’s mind is vicious – Gosh your lips are delicious
Well maybe just a half a drink more – Never such a blizzard before


I’ve got to go home – Oh, baby, you’ll freeze out there
Say, lend me your coat – It’s up to your knees out there
You’ve really been grand – I thrill when you touch my hand
But don’t you see – How can you do this thing to me?
There’s bound to be talk tomorrow – Think of my life long sorrow
At least there will be plenty implied – If you caught pneumonia and died
I really can’t stay – Get over that hold out
Ahh, but it’s cold outside



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Aug 09

Ruminations of an eBay Buyer

Sometimes I wish a natural disaster would occur just so people would be distracted and I could get items on eBay much cheaper.

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Mar 04

Gary Gygax, fails Save vs. Death at 69

For those of you who do not know, Gary Gygax, the father of D&D, died at 69.

Like many great people throughout time, he did not invent something from scratch. He created the world of Dungeons and Dragons from the archetypes that J.R.R. Tolkien imagined. This in no way diminishes his achievements, for millions of lives have been affected.

To me, and plenty of other kids who preferred brain over brawn, he gave us an outlet for our creativity. He created a world where the only limit was your imagination. A world where guidelines were given, you fleshed out the details, and was created with a simple 5-word magical incantation; “You are in a bar…”

I’m sure there will be many other posts like this (but this one is mine) around the Internet today, and my self-serving nature merely wants to contribute. Boring you with details on how he affected my life would be completely pointless; those of you who played Dungeons and Dragons understand, those of you who didn’t, won’t.

To Gary, let’s just hope the deity you meet in the after-life isn’t begrudging you for being left out of Deities and Demi-Gods.

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Dec 12

Pet Peeves I: Single Sign-On

The Internet would be better if two related technologies would work together:

  1. Google needs to get their ass in gear and present their Single Sign-On (SSO) package.
  2. Forum Coders and Popular Websites need to embrace this technology.

I’m TIRED of having to create a new sign-on for every stupid shitty website (including THIS one) I want to post information on. Read the rest of this entry »

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Dec 08

Chronicles of the Snowmen

Classic Calvin and Hobbes, read and enjoy.
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Oct 04

A Look Back: 50 Years Ago

Today marks the 50th anniversary of the Sputnik launch by Russia, essentially the beginning of the Space Age. It’s times like this that makes one marvel at the capabilities of human ingenuity.

When one considers the hundreds of years it took to go from using stone to bronze to iron, and the thousands of years to just get to the Stone age, it really shows the human potential when you consider the Industrial Revolution was only a mere 150-year span.

In a paltry 50 years, we have a (relatively) stable space program with regular human flight, created a world-wide electronic data network, developed nuclear power and even gave blacks the right to vote.

And now, I can’t help but think what will happen in my lifetime (hopefully another 50 years). Will commercial space flight be available? Will everything be Internet-ready? Will there be a black President?

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Sep 10

Everyone’s A Little Bit Racist

You can ask my half-black friend, I’m not a racist. I have seen most episodes of Def Jam (when Martin Lawrence hosted), can name a Hip-Hop artist other than 50 Cent or Snoop Dogg, and even enjoy fried chicken and watermelon.

That opening paragraph is normally the battle-cry of someone riddled with White Guilt. Someone who believes they have to justify their actions to lesser people who will judge them. I have no such quality, therefore you will not get an apology for this post. If you are someone who cannot differentiate between statements of fact (”Mexican immigrants, on average, have lower incomes than Natives.”), observation (”English people have bad teeth.”) and stereotypes (”Chinese people have trouble with our ‘R’ sound.”), all of which are not inherently racist, then scram. I’m only talking to people with open minds.

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